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Laws

  1. O'Reilly's Law of the Kitchen: Cleanliness is next to impossible.
  2. Lieberman's Law: Everybody lies; but it doesn't matter since nobody listens.
  3. Denniston's Law: Virtue is its own punishment.
  4. Gold's Law: If the shoe fits, it's ugly.
  5. Handy Guide to Modern Science: If it's green or it wiggles, it's biology. If it stinks, it's chemistry. If it doesn't work, it's physics.
  6. Conway's Law: In any organization there will always be one person who knows what's going on. This person must be fired.
  7. Cody's Law of Debate: Anything is possible if you don't know what you're talking about.
  8. Stewart's Law of Retroaction: It's easier to get forgiveness than permission.
  9. First Rule of History: History deosnt' repeat itself - historians merely repeat each other.
  10. Finster's Law: No matter where you go, there you are.
  11. Lynch's Law: When the going gets tough, everyone leaves.
  12. Glyme's Formula for Success: The secret of success is sincerity. Once you can fake that, you've got it made.
  13. Mason's First Law of Synergism: The one day you'd sell your soul for something, souls are a glut.
  14. The Sausage Principle: People who love sausage and respect the law should never watch either one being made.
  15. Harrison' Postulate: For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.
  16. Hanlon's Razor: Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.
  17. The Six Phases of a Project: Enthusiasm, Disillusionment, Panic, The Search for the Guilty, The Punishment of the Innocent, Praise and honors for the non-participants.

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